|Satsang –||Volume 10, Number 7: June 29, 2007|
The Way You Think You Are, You Never Exist
… In English, the word for vichaar is to think. ... The thought of someone coming or going and the thought of your own sense of freedom or bondage is due to your birth, that you have come on earth. Everybody thinks in this way. He thinks along with his thought, and the meaning of it is entertained as being good—or not good. Whereas a child is born without thought, which means he has no thought. When I say that a child is born, you can understand that his life will be for a hundred years and what a grand person he will be. But we have to take the present state of happening into consideration, that he came without thought. And you do not know when thought is developed. All human beings are born such that they have no clue of when the initial thinking comes. Now, we are fully developed persons, and we think.
In Hindi, the word for thinking is always filled with the sense of duality, or two: I am a child, and you are a mother; I am a boy, and you are a bat—something like that. Why? Our senses are made such that they are first subjective, and anything before them is an object. It is not necessary to know how this thought arose in a human being, but everybody knows that it is like that.
Many people do not know it is like that. Many people think that whatever they think, that’s right. They do not consider pros and cons or any such thing as whether or not this thought should be executed immediately —they just don’t. Your association with people shows that they don’t have time to think twice. Rather you yourself just think, and then you do what you think. That means you think, and that is your man, that is your being, that is your person. …
People also associate vichaar with knowledge. Then vichaar is of the type that it should be good to your body or person, otherwise it is called a-vichaar, ku-vichaar; and if you don’t have any mind, then we say it is nir-vichaar. …
Now comes, which vichaar should you have? In the middle of these many things in the market, which one do you want to buy? So you have to seek within yourself, in your head and in your heart, what is that which you want the most? Having come over here, sitting over here, you can check. You don’t want anything of the type that is being sold in the market at this time, or being lived in society at this time, and you are sitting. So I should know what is that which you want, then I can talk. If I do not know what you want, I will not be able to talk.
If anybody comes, then you have to ask, “What have you come for?” He answers, “Well, I have come to ask for a glass of water.” Then you say, “Yes, welcome, I’m going to bring it.” If he says, “I have come to ask for your necklace,” you say, “You are not a right person.” All this is your mental program. When the mind comes—you have not to know if it comes or it does not come—it begins to think and function. You become a person with a mind that works very fast: it is a fast concluder. Now, I have to think who is a fast concluder. So I am talking with an understanding that you are fast concluders, therefore I have to tell you that which you will conclude.
I’ll say, “You have attained the state or standard of understanding which makes you know that you are deathless.” In an instant, you have concluded, “Swamiji knows we are deathless.” But now, a struggle is there. You immediately concluded the meaning of my words as “You are deathless,” yet you are stamped, you are crystallized that “No, Swamiji is saying something very unusual. It must be wrong. It cannot be.” So your conclusion is also that. You concluded, “Yes, he means we are deathless, he knows it,” yet you think, “Well, this is not correct.” You will never accept the word “deathless,” because you have already thought that it is incorrect.
Now, I bring in vichaar. Your vichaar is of this type. And I say, “Meditate, close your eyes, and have vichaar—I have given you vichaar —that the real Being I am, Pure Free Forever, Immortal Blissful, Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum, Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum, Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum.” Vichaar.
Now this vichaar doesn’t fall in the category of your thinking that Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum could be anybody. So it is concluded by you, “It’s a sort of plum-plum. He has to say Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. And now let me know what else he says?” [Laughter.] Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum has nothing to do with you. What else he says! So you are wanting to know that which your thinking is, and you do not come out of thinking. …
All human beings also have this: whatever they hear, they conclude that it must be true. Everybody says something and is covering up something which is underlying in their head, while outwardly, on the thought level, they speak like this. This much the knowledge program goes on. So human beings are conscious human beings, with thinking, understanding, and all that. But that is not vichaar. That is the human mental sphere, it is not vichaar.
Vichaar is that the world, and you in the world, and worldly people, and things in the world, did not exist. They will not exist. Therefore, a person like you, who is on the path of awareness, should be aware that they do not exist even now. [He snaps his fingers.] That is vichaar. So if you meditate, you have to counteract your total personality, which you have made, that “I am this”—and all your conditions. Because as a child, this was not. So I remind you again and again, “Look, do you remember what you were as a child?” But now, it’s too late for you, or you are too blocked. This is called, “I am blocked.” So you are alright when you say, “I am blocked.” Why? Because that which is your reality, that you have blocked, and that which is not, you have put on.
I do not tell you this truth, but somehow it has been leaked out today, that Existence alone exists—not you in the past, not you in the present, not you in the future. And the human intellect in the head has been made such that there has been the past, there has been the future, and there has been in between, the present. Yet the reality is the past has never been, the present is not, and the future will never be. This means, timelessness is the result. Timelessness, I’m talking. …
I tell you that I have understood what you have said, and you mean that Indian [a North American Indian], and I mean this Indian. That is human understanding. Therefore, we never get along. You are there, thinking for the last forty years, and I am here, thinking for the last millions of years. I say now, in this lifetime (as you know this is the lifetime), if you are learning, then learn this fundamental truthful fact, which has never been said to you:
You will ask, “Then, what is that which exists in me? I am blocked, no doubt, and I’m knowing I am blocked, but I want to know what will happen if the blockage is over?” I say, “When the block is gone, it is Space.” You are a block, six feet tall and four feet wide. You are a big block. [Laughter.] A children’s block. And you live on a certain block. …
It is a great study for story writers. Each person is a great story. So a story can be written. I am talking a story, you are listening to a story, and I know that it’s a story. A story means kahaani, kathan—that which has never been, and it is said. That means a story. … You have grown through stories. All education is nothing but stories. And now, I have spoken about your true nature, which you are seeking, but you do not want to have the knowledge of the answer. I know your heart, mind and total being is seeking the knowledge that you are liberated Being, you are free Being, you are pure Being, you are eternal Being. But you are trained now, because of your birth as a human being, from the very womb of your mother. For nine months, there was your training period. In that period, you got built and everything, and then you came out. Then there was a further training period for seven years—then seven years, and seven years, it goes on. So you are trained minds. And now, I cannot change the training. So I speak in such a way that you should be able to compare the training of the type that you have gone through, and the training for a person who I know I am training—that you should also know. But that person is not here among you, so you cannot get training. …
I have told you that vichaar is only this: I am Immortal, I am Blissful. If this has not become your awareness, you should not worry about it. Treat it that vichaar has not been applied and used, vichaar is not working, and the result is not coming. Why? Because you do not have vichaar: you have thinking. Based on this thinking, all your actions and the whole activity is there. Vichaar is not thinking. How would you translate vichaar in English? Realization. Realization is not thinking. When you meditate, then “I am Immortal, I am Blissful” is the result of realization, so vichaar is realization.
If you want to get training, then training is not of the tongue. You can say, “I am Immortal, I am Blissful,” you can repeat it a hundred times, as a parrot can, but in the head of the parrot, which is blocked, the meaning does not go in. That is the type that human blockage is. Human blockage is that the box is very nice, the television is very nice, there are many channels in it, millions of channels are over there, but there is no electricity in it. [Laughter.] … Unless your plug is plugged properly in the socket, there is no way that you can receive or can get it. That is where vichaar is. …
Everywhere, there is the ego game. … Now, you have come to know vichaar. At that time, don’t worry about the mind or thinking, vaasaanaa or desire, the Upanishads or the Vedas—nothing! [Laughter.] You should just be totally nir-ahankaar, no ahankaar [ego] —that is expected of you. That is called the I-free state, egolessness. Egolessness will be when no vritti reaches you: that is Yog. Yog means unity, purity. Yog is the goal that everybody has. In this science, the goal is Yog. …
We are born as human beings. We have lost Yog. Yog is our source. Here, we are viyog [separate], we are all viyogis. The one who feels “I am a viyogi,” he feels wretched. He says, “There is something wrong with me.” He begins to have that trouble, pain, and suffering. Then he begins to express, and kavita [poetry] comes. The first kavi [poet] was a viyogi kavi. All children remain in the womb of their mothers, where there is no problem of any kind. As soon as they come, they are all kavi-viyogis [poets of separation], they’re all crying. Crying means praying, praying means expressing. Expressing what? That “I am here, and I don’t know what I am here for, and who brought me here. You just tell me. It is not working over here. I am really uncomfortable. I tried hard—I did this, I did that, everything I do. But in the end, I am wretched. Please remove my wretchedness.” That’s called viyog. So it is to remove viyog. In satsang, for two hours, you are not a viyogi, you are Yog. And I have not said anything, I have not given you a technique or anything. I just talked about certain things, and your viyog was not there for forty-five minutes [that he has been talking].
So vichaar has been explained. If you have understood it, just have your eyes closed—that state. [He closes his eyes.] As soon as you have closed your eyes, that is the state of vichaar, the space of vichaar. So don’t apply thinking— thinking comes by itself, you don’t have to apply it. What am I saying? You remain Being, as you are, Pure Free Forever. But that is the only state you don’t get, because you are born as a human being. They say a human being is a thoughtful human being, a thinking human being, an active human being, a mental human being, an aspiring human being. And I’m saying that you have this tool, use it for the purpose of Being. This has become, the body has become something. From Be, it comes, so it is be-come, manifestation. Such as a small flower turns into a fruit, a flower became a fruit, but it does not mean that the flower has died.
The human intellect has not been given that power that it can understand such a thing. That is why Guru is needed, who knows. It is some kind of head. All heads have different things. In somebody’s head, Yog appears, in somebody’s head, inquiry appears. I’m talking about that place where Yog has appeared. In Yog, there is no sense of separation, or individuality, or ego-consciousness, or profit and gain, or victory and defeat. It is just the Space. So Yog, in language, can be translated as Unity—a unit, but not separate. I’ll be quiet. … [Meditation.]
… then you build the same old identification, managing in your memory that you have been originally de-identified, and outwardly, after your birth, with your senses and mind, you have put on a superimposed state, which is called identification. Adding the formless, timeless, space-less, de-identified Being in your intellectual knowledge, you’ll be much better and richer than the thought of your personality, which says “I am this” or “I am that.” With this knowledge, if you go and leave to anywhere, you’ll still be holding or knowing—not that you have to remember very fast, it is held by itself—that “I am Pure Free Forever. Also, I am a name and form, with qualities, talents, and expressions.” Then be with the people in the world, doing the work of helping them, giving them service, giving them profit, and giving them happiness. That is the result of the final beatitude. Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. …
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