Satsang  –   Volume 6, Number 10: June 30, 2003
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Meditation Technique: Meditation Is Awareness

Abhimanyu: Swamiji, I have a question about meditation. The other day, I was meditating on a bridge by the river. Some people walked across the bridge, but I did not feel like opening my eyes. I was having a great time. After some time, my eyes opened, but my body was not moving. Everything was in slow motion, and Agni [his son] was down in the river having fun. I was just very happy, very joyful—but I could not really move. My body had an itch and my hand wanted to go up to scratch it, but I thought, "Oh, forget about it." It was a very different kind of state. I want to ask if that is also part of meditation?

Swamiji: No.

Abhimanyu: What is it?

Swamiji: Sometimes you may be sitting for a long time in one posture and then try to get up, but you can’t move. Sometimes you are meditating for a long time or you are meditating deeply, and your mind-energy, your praan-energy, has been shifted from the body-side and has gone into the atmosphere. The body has become so heavy, so heavy, that you cannot be lifted. As long as the mind is electrifying the senses, the body, and the cells, the body remains light. But when the mind has taken off, then the body becomes very heavy. This is not part of meditation, but it is part of the mind’s coming and going.

Abhimanyu: It was a very joyful state.

Swamiji: There were no feelings of anything, neither pain, suffering, nor worry, because the mind was not there but the praan [vital energy] was still in the body. The mind had been disconnected from the praan, so the praan and body became very heavy. This happens. A human being is not really just sixty-five kilos, he is much heavier; when a person is dead, even four persons cannot lift him, he is that heavy. The body is light just because of the mind. I was taking a bath in a tub full of water, and I was trying to sit on the bottom of it, but I kept coming up. The water was heavier than my body, so I had to hold on to something, then I was able to sit. Otherwise, the tub was full and my body kept coming up. They were taking photographs, and I thought that the body should not keep moving this way and that, so I thought to do the lotus posture. But the moment I had no grip on the tub, then I would be lifted up. Human beings have different concepts. I had a different concept that I would sit like that, but that was happening.

So the Experiencer, who is the Knower, is always there. You are talking about the Knower. It was the Knower who saw that the mind was gone, who saw that the body was heavy, who saw Agni Raj having fun in the water, and who felt the bridge shaking. That was the Knower, and the Knower is your reality. If somehow, through this practice of meditation, you come to know that "I am the Knower," then even meditation is not essential. Then, live a normal life and join some politics, talk something, or anything like that. Just live normally. …

I am aware of the psychology of a human being, because as long as his mind is there, it must function—"must function" means that it must function in duality, and "function" means that however great you are, one has to put you down somewhere. First, they lift you up, and after a few days, they break you up completely. How many prime ministers came on earth, but nobody remembers them. As long as the mind is in the body, it has to function that way. When it functions that way, then you begin to understand that in water you can sit and you do have not to swim. But if you do not swim, God knows where you will go while being in the river; you will be like a leaf and will drift anywhere, water is that heavy. Even these big heavy rocks float in the water like little pebbles.

But you can only know this when you practice, know, and experience. In your case, this happened when you were meditating because your mind was not there. It had left. Why did the mind leave? Because in accordance with my information to you, you were not remembering Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. You had dropped remembering it and had meditated, your head went down, or anything. Your mind was not getting subtler, and subtler, and subtler, and becoming Self, Self, Self. It left, the way that it leaves in deep sleep.

So the meditation technique is: you have to be aware in meditation. Suppose you are saying a word, maybe Om. [Swamiji whispers Om a few times.] Your eyes may be anywhere, but the attention—which I call the mind or the awareness in the mind—is going along with that. We do not do yogi feats and all that, but we use words. It can be any word, maybe the words "one, two." [Swamiji whispers,] "One two one two one two one two one two one two one two one two one two one two." [He is silent.] It left. And I say that it should not leave. But I compromise, because you think that your mind left and you could not perceive. I know that this happens, yet I say, "Yes, that is meditation." Meditation is very simple: for just ten or fifteen minutes, you can be concentrated. Again, I don’t say to be concentrated, because you will make a mistake.

Suppose I speak now, and you check: Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum [then he whispers] Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. [He is quiet for some time.] I did not leave the attention anywhere—just as many times I am repeating Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum (I may be speaking it out loud, by tongue inside, or mentally), and then I only become aware that I am repeating it. It was not fully Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. No, I came down to [he begins to whisper,] Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma Aa Ma. As long as I am aware, I am light and I am alright. But it so happens that if you are concentrated, then the mind leaves, which means that awareness has also gone. But if you have to have victory over the mind, then awareness has to be there. You do not know how to have awareness if you do not have any assisting element like Amaram Madhuram. Even if you say, "One two, one two, one two," but you have to have your attention over there. Then you are actually attending attention, and then there is no form at that time. That is the way to meditate.

Abhimanyu: I had spoken to you about the same thing. I had told you that there comes a time when I am not aware of anything during meditation, but at that time you had said that that is meditation. But obviously, after hearing you now, that is when the mind goes away.

Swamiji: That was not meditation—but it will happen again and again, so I have to say that it is part of meditation. But now you have asked and made it clear, and I have made it clear. But inside my heart and mind, I am afraid that they will not do what I have just said. They will not be able to do it, and you will also not be able to do it. But then you will say, "I will try." The moment you try, the mind will still play the same thing. That is why if the meditator keeps meditating and meditating but not listening to anything, then he never grows. Awareness! You only have to be aware. While you are driving your car, you cannot be unaware. If you slip somewhere, an accident will take place. You are so alert in driving, like Schumacher, who drives at such a great speed. There must be some extraordinary concentration there, but that is sort of physical. But here, you go in the depth of the mind—and there You are. The depth of the mind is that Awareness from where the mind bubble—a very small, small bubble—arises here, and then you say, "Yes, Dikpal." God knows from where it started. I am talking about Dikpal, and now—Osnat. God knows how the process started that Osnat came. This is what the mind does not know. The mind is too gross. But we have to go through that.

When meditation is performed, we do not emphasize on that, because people begin to concentrate and during concentration more loss than gain takes place. Suppose you say that you are meditating on one point, such as we are meditating on number six on the clock. You are holding your attention over there, your eyes are there, but the mind has gone to Lorna [Dikpal’s mother in Edmonton]. That is where you have to see that the mind does not go to Lorna. The mind, intellect, ego, and all the faculties are there, and when concentration takes place, the mind will slip. That is what happens, so the mind remains wandering.

I am a meditator, so I know all the ins and outs of it. I allow you to do it, I do not disturb you, because each person has his own style of meditation, and I never check you and ask, "What do you do? What do you do? What do you do?" I think that I am instructing and they must be following my instructions. But in such situations as he when has asked, then I say. Not many days are left for him here, and he would have thought that that is part of meditation, so that when someday he will become heavy he would have said, "I am meditating, I cannot get up now." Many people will say, "Well, I am spaced out, I cannot cook. I am spaced out, I cannot walk. I am spaced out, I cannot sing."

This is where the human deceptive mechanism, the mind, is there. It deceives the inner Being, and it keeps the inner Being in it. As long as the inner Being is in the mind, it is doing well, but the moment the inner Being wants to be separated from it, the mind has a great grip. Whenever a lion takes his prey in his paw, try hard, it is not possible for it to get out of that grip. Even though the buffalo cries, he just dies. So in this way, it takes time. That is why we go slowly. We do not say to meditate the whole time. So many faculties are there, and you have to see everything. …

That is the human mind, So it is not easy. The Master says that it is not easy, but it is possible. It is not easy to get liberated, but it is possible that you can get liberated. When did you get bound? You will never know. Because you are born. Now, when you are born, you cannot think that these are not my hands, knees, and stomach. I am saying that this is what a human being is—and his ambition is that he should be free. So you can understand that either your ambition is alright, or the maayik grip on your body is alright [the grip of the power through which the Self is not known]. So there are two things, gyan [knowledge of the Self] and agyan [ignorance of the Self].

Those people who have been doing this work have gotten something out of their meditation. They may not know what they have gained, but each one of you is aware that it has worked for you. … As far as meditation is concerned, the right technique of meditation is knowing that you are aware: Awareness. If it has been done just like this without meditation, very good. But it should ooze out in your system. That is where you can check it. The system still needs purification. … Abhimanyu says that God Realization is first, and everything else is later on. That is correct. God Realization is first. But then, without the mind creeping in you know that God Realization is such that in it no world forms exist, only God exists. If you have the wrong concept of God, then again it will not work. So I gave you a very correct way of admiring your concept, because you are a human being. You have accepted that with which you lost your connection. You accepted the body and lost the connection of your Source, which is before birth and after death. You lost the connection, and you say that your Source is not in the middle of birth and death. I am simply saying that if you are aware that it was before and it will be afterwards, then it is here now. [He snaps his fingers.] That is Realization.

Then, you have not to exert too much in your body. Whenever you think your awareness is going out of the way, drop it and don’t meditate at that time. Suppose it is going and you cannot control it, that is where you have to begin slowly and gently. You get into meditation, but half way your head is down and your awareness is gone. Then, when you ask what it is, I say that it is awareness—but awareness is lost. But if I say that awareness is not, then you are confused and ask, "Then, what is that in the waking state?" I say that it is the waking state mind. Then you ask, "What is that in deep sleep?" I reply that in deep sleep, the mind is not. But you do not grasp that there is Awareness. So the same thing happens when you are in meditation and you are not aware—you think it is like deep sleep. You say, "Swamiji, I did not know anything," whereas Gyan or the Self is that where you do not have to know anything. Fire is that where fire does not have to know fire. The Self or Awareness does not have to know Awareness. You want to question, but you do not know how to, because you do not express. At least he has expressed, "Is that meditation?" If you become heavy and you cannot get up, that is not part of meditation—or else if someone meditates and his legs do not get up, that means that in a minute, if suddenly there is a fire, you will not even be able to run. That is not meditation.

Meditation is alertness. Alertness is not deep sleep, dream, or the waking state. So the name of meditation is alertness. If we say meditation, then alertness must be there. But when you become non-alert, then what should I say? Because you are not in any of the three states, but still you are. Then I have to say that it is part of meditation. [Laughter.] You just have to see if meditation is bringing lightness in you, a worriless state in you, something healthy in you, and more power so that if you want to do something then you can do it. If you say, "I am not going to eat rubbish" and you don’t eat it, then treat it that meditation is working—for power came. You may have the thought to kill someone, but if you meditate then the power will come that, "Well, the thought to kill might be coming, but I will not kill anyone." These powers do come through meditation, and a human being becomes much better. As far as your human life is concerned, you already know that each person is living differently.

You have picked up everything listening to me, but I have not given you the technique of meditation. I only say that don’t mind if thoughts come and thoughts go. Thoughts come and go, but if you don’t mind, then you are that which is Awareness. Thoughts come, and you know that they are foreign, they are not Me—because you have never become a thought. And thoughts go, so let them go—you have never become thought. When you have never become the body, then the body-problem will not be there. As far as pain and suffering and all that is concerned, it is there and it will be felt; it does not mean that this should not happen. The whole bundle of the body is nothing but awareness. In that, all the faculties came: eyes, ears, intestines, hands, and feet all came, all the different varieties of powers are working, and you have to harmonize them and have balance. Akhilesh was saying that all sports people have to have balance. If they lose the balance, they lose the game. They know this, and they are all human beings. Whatever they are doing, it is all correct for me. There has been nothing incorrect: there is no ignorance. When I am established in that, then even when you ask about meditation, I know that if I answer that that is not meditation, then meditation will not be done. But at least meditation is being done, and no harm is there. I like that type of meditation. A few people used to go into such a jar samaadhi [insentient experience of the Self], that even if you kept beating their heads, they would not get up—and they would say that they were in samaadhi! …

I know all the ins and outs, because what did I do for seventy-eight years? Only meditation. I must be an expert by now. There are some people who do  meditation wheret here is no awareness. They do not know where they are sitting or how much they are sitting. If I tell you to meditate, I am aware that it should not be to the point where you cannot get up. Someone’s feet are not working, someone’s tongue is not working, so I get someone who is active. You may not be active, I can understand this, but it does not mean that you are unaware. Yet many people have adopted saying that, "Swamiji, I am spaced out, I cannot speak a word." I say, "Yes, that’s right." They cannot understand what I am saying or what I mean. I am not disturbing anybody—and you are the ones who feel that "Swamiji should not disturb me in any way." It is such a privilege for you that I never disturb anybody. If you say that when you meditate there is pain in your stomach, I will not say to stop meditation. I say that on that day you must have eaten a lot. I have never discouraged meditation. Because meditation is the only state where the power of contradicting the mind’s psychology, or the mind’s function, comes. So this is it.

Abhimanyu: Swamiji a lot of people meditate and nod off. I asked you this question before.

Swamiji: I did not say, because you also do the same thing.

Abhimanyu: I know, because I can only follow, I can’t lead.

Swamiji: I never initiated you, so in the beginning I did not tell you how you should do meditation. I have never initiated many people, so they have their own style, and they continue doing it. Many of you meditate in your own style, and having come over here I did not check what type of meditation you are doing. Many people do transcendental meditation, and many do their own meditation. I keep giving information, but I do not say that you should do this type. But there is only one type of meditation and that is: Awareness should not be left. That’s all. Thank you very much.

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