|Satsang –||Volume 13, Number 3: February 24, 2010|
Whatever The Self Thinks, You Become
Shaarda: … When you say, Swamiji, that whatever we pray for happens, what should I understand by that?
Swamiji: I say this because if small children pray to their mother, “Give me some candies,” their mother gives them. If, through an application, a human being prays to an employer, the employer gives him a job. That’s what I mean. But if you pray for something which is not there, who will give it to you? So what do you pray for? You pray for health. And you do not know what health is. So you pray for the body—which you already have. Why do you want to pray for health?
Shaarda: That was one example, which I gave. But my mind, in its dualistic vaasanaa functioning…
Swamiji: You must know what vaasanaa is. You have heard the word vaasanaa so much, so you began to use it. What is vaasanaa? Vaasanaa is to be understood. When vaasanaa is not understood yet you use it, then you use words as many children do, but they do not have any meaning for them. So we use the word vaasanaa for a sense which is never there, yet it says that the body—and then the body-senses, body-mind, body-relations and the world—all that is true. That is called vaasanaa. So for vaasanaa, vaasanaa is making a human being and the world. Whereas the human being and the world are not there. So how will vaasanaa succeed?
Shaarda: It won’t.
Swamiji: It won’t. Then you say, “I’m filled with vaasanaa.” When vaasanaa is not going to succeed, then you have to be vaasanaa-free. Who is vaasanaa-free in a human being? Not your finger. It’s attached to the hand. Not your hand. It’s attached to the body. The body is attached to the mind. And the mind is attached to the intellect. As the finger is jar [insentient], so all these to which it is attached are also jar. The mind is attached to the intellect, the intellect is attached to ahankaar [the individual I-sense], and ahankaar is attached to the jeev, the soul. They’re all jar. And the soul is attached to vaasanaa, which is the seed of ahankaar. So ahankaar is attached to vaasanaa, and vaasanaa is that which is consciousness. And consciousness is negative. So unless consciousness is known to have been attached to the Aatma—to the Self, Pure Free Forever—till then, this is all jar srishthi [world], jar things, about which your human mind says, “This is real.” To jar it calls Chaytan, or real. And to Chaytan-Aatma, it calls jar. So this is granthi, a knot.
That is the human mind. As long as the human mind is there, whatever you are doing, whatever you are praying for, then whatever the mind can give you, it gives you. Sometimes it gives you joy, sometimes failure, sometimes happiness or something like that, all these things, and sometimes nothing. So to whom are you praying? You are praying to the mind! So when I say, “When you pray,” “you pray” means “when you realize you are Pure Free Forever.” Then whatever you think, it becomes. Whatever you as a child came to know, such as, “I am a person,” then you became a person. Because whatever the Self thinks, you become. That is what I say. So if you pray that you should become You, then you will become. But you are the body. And I have analyzed or expressed that the body is jar. So that which is Chaytan is not known to a human being. And that is our work—because it exists.
But we don’t have the capacity or power to know it. Suppose you are in the waking state. Now, before you go to the dream, you are awake. Going to the dream, between the waking state and the dream, there is a gap. That gap is the Self. That gap is the Knower. That Knower you are. But you call the waking-state man as consciousness which is caught. So Freedom is not realized.
I’m saying that when you watch this flower vase and flowers, then you have seen it. And now you see Tal. What happened to you that Tal came in your vision and the flowers have gone? That is Purity. You: flowers. Purity became the flowers. And Purity became Tal. But Purity is neither Tal nor the flowers. That is what you are.
If you get that, then there is no vaasanaa. Otherwise, this mechanism will continue. You think of Manali, where you take hot baths for your health. After that you think of Dr. Nagpal in Chandigarh, or Dr. Grewal, the eye doctor who is coming. Now, what happened? The hot baths. And then Chandigarh’s Dr. Grewal. You cannot see Dr. Grewal if the hot baths are hanging to you. It is like that.
That’s why I say I can speak about it, but I cannot take a flower and give it to you. It’s not like that. So I speak about how you are basically Guru—which you read in books. Guru is the meaning of Pure. But to you, Guru means this [pointing to his body], and Pure means not this. So for Mary, Pure means the sky and Mary means the gross body, or bones and blood. Whereas I say there is only Pure. That is where the intellect does not get it.
So if the intellect is not purified, you will never get it. You will get near, because I am talking and at that time you become it. Especially when I’m talking, then you become it. And when I drop talking—again health. So you reach there. In this way, we are practising. Our practice is to become Shyam Space. … Now Shyam Space has no form. And these eyes will call Shyam Space whenever they see form. When Guru speaks about Shyam Space, then you will think, “He must be knowing it, he’s there, he’s quite close to it.”
Akshar Brahm, Shyam Space, our Kamla used to practise. Everything was there. Now, Kamla’s body has died. But Shyam Space did not die. I am that Shyam Space which she knew. All of you know me, so you know Shyam Space. It is there. But I know that it is there. You think you are blood and bones and size and learning, not Shyam Space.
So I lead your attention towards your body, that if you think it is the bulky, gross body, then reduce it by thinking of when you were a little child. It became subtler. Then get into the womb of your mother. It became still subtlest. Nine months before that, it was not there. It became Shyam Space. So why did Shyam Space becoming a bubble become something else? Why did water becoming a snowflake become something else? Why did water becoming a cloud become something else? Why did a cloud, and a man seeing the lightning in it, become something else? Why did the blueness of the sky become something else?
In this way, I talk to those people who say that everything is separate. And I say the sky and blueness is one and the same. Because you think blueness is separate and the sky is separate, when I say, “No, it is one,” then you understand. But when I don’t say this, then for you blueness and the sky are separate. I say that the bubble and water is one because you see water is separate and the bubble is separate. You see fragrance is separate and the flower is separate. So then when I say that fragrance and the flower is one, you hear it and Oneness comes. In this way, I say a big body and a small body is one, but you say the photograph of when you were small is separate and a photograph of when you became big is separate. Then slowly and slowly, I put you into pure One. Because you are always making duality.
In this way, Kamla’s body died. Now it is a problem for you to understand. Even for Dr. Gaurav and all those people. Who is there who can tell you that you never die? Kamla came to know this. On her birthday she told me, “Swamiji, you have led me to that state that I am: I am deathless.” So I said, “Then why are you observing your birthday?” [Laughter] She said, “Satsang.” So she never died. Because she was never a Kamla. She was not a name. She was not a little form. Not hair. She was Shyam Space.
Now, all of you are Shyam Space. But how should I approach you so that you know, “I am Shyam Space”? You say, “I am Tal.” “I am Jyoti Shakti.” “I am Don.” “I am Dick.” “I am Dan.” “I am Shaarda.” Your I is Shyam Space. And you make Shaarda. Your I is water and you make a bubble. How come this became different Shyam Space? So Shyam Space alone is. You think, “Then what about these forms?” That is the trouble.
As long as this mind exists and it doesn’t get that it’s all Oneness, then you will say one and two, one without a second and a second without one, which you can understand. But you will not understand that neither a second is there nor one is there. That is the meaning of one without a second. When I say that both are not there, then, like Mary, you think, “Then, it must be heaven—anything is not there, it is one without a second.” But I say, “That is the stuff of which the whole world is made. So why will that stuff become anything else? Everything is That.”
I try to approach you again. When you don’t understand, then I say, “There is a possibility for you to understand.” What is that? Take the dream state. How is it that in your dream all the big mountains are there, the pile of snow is there, all the roads are clear, skiing is going on, everything is there. And when you wake up, which means when you realize, then there is nothing. But when you realize for a moment that there is nothing, then again you remember, “Oh, I saw a dream,” and you describe it. It is the same thing in the waking state. You are seeing everything and you say, “That is true.” Aatma Shakti says the waking-state mind is true and its capacity is to see all these things. That capacity is in the dream also. So why does that capacity differ from this waking state?
This is also a dream. But it’s not one man in the dream—all are dreaming the dream. So when I say, “You are in my dream and I am in your dream,” you say, “Yes, both of us exist.” [Laughter] Because you made the dream something. And the dream was never there. So why is the dream there? The world was never there. So why is the world there? Then you say, “Then, what is this?” I say, “It’s all Guru.” That is Shyam Space. That is Pure. That is Free. That is forever the same. Therefore, where is birth? Where is death? In dreams, you have seen many births and many deaths. And you wake up and you cancel them. Because there was nothing. But when you wake up, you don’t cancel that. Rather, you celebrate. [Laughter] …
A denture does not produce words. [Laughter] The teeth and tongue do not produce them. Why is it difficult for you to understand who produces words? [Laughter] That is the whole thing. So it’s not only for one day—for the last forty years I am saying this. And if it has not happened, we don’t give up. That’s the only quality and capacity with us. Because we are the same. Unless we are convinced it is there, we can’t enjoy—which means we can’t get it. That’s the meaning of enjoying. That’s what your prayer is.
Shaarda: That was my prayer answered, Swamiji. Thank you so much.
Swamiji: Now, you prayed and it happened. But you are a desireful person. Buddha was reached and prayed to by a woman who had a child in her womb for seven years, but it was not coming out. So she went to Buddha and said, “Lord, do something that the child should come.” So he said, “So be it.” A couple of days later, the child came out. She was in trouble for seven years, yet after the child became two or three years old and Buddha again came to her city, she went and offered her child and prayed to Buddha, “Can I have seven more children?” [Laugher] Forty-nine years! She knew it was a trouble, still she was having the same desire! So agyan [ignorance of the Self] is very difficult. It is very great and powerful. That is where human agyan is. It’s called ahankaar. Ahankaar is agyan.
Luckily, we have language. And in this language, we have learned words. A child does not know words. So why it is very essential for you to know your Self when you close your eyes and you know it? Still, you want to know the words! When you meditate, it’s very simple. As soon as you close your eyes, you are there. And you don’t understand that. You seek health. Health means disease. What is the necessity of disease? …
Everything is being done by You. You are Mary. You are Reta. You are Dick. You are Satyam. You are Annissa. This is the first row. You are Dan also. Everyone is That. It’s one Being. One tree and these many leaves. You must know that there are at least that many people on earth as there are leaves in one tamarind tree. So where is the world? It’s only in one atom of a tamarind tree. In one atom, that is anubhav [Pure Experience]. In one anubhav, somewhere a little thing sitting over there, millions of worlds exist.
You see this daily. We had gone nearly to Rohtang Pass. There were piles of snow. We have never seen that much snow. Everywhere, there were big mountains of snow. Was it not adhiyagya, the all-permeating reality? And each snowflake was speaking, “I exist.” Each one. That is the individual ahankaar. So as long as the individual ahankaar is there, you cannot be a friend to another snowflake—let alone to the whole universal pile of snow. So Guru is the one who is the whole, therefore he is not an individual: he is an individual, but the whole; he is the whole and an individual. So where is difference? It is one. That is called Guru Consciousness. Thank you. [Applause] …
We close the eyes and just watch. There is no graveyard, no womb of the mother, no cavity of the sky and earth. You are out of it—which means, Pure Free Forever. Only Awareness, Awareness, Awareness. Chaytan, Chaytan, Chaytan Pure. The human mind makes chaytan and jar. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying Pure. It’s neither two nor one. It is Pure. When you hear this, you become that: because you are already that. You recognize it. Having recognized it, there are advantages. Wherever you go, you are free from division, which means free from fear. You are free from desire, which means the fear of not getting satisfied. You are free from achievement, because you have already achieved. Yet you are aware as Awareness. …
I invariably use this language every day—your language, of your mind, of your intellect, of your I, of your sense of pain and suffering, of your sense of joy and celebration. Because, body-wise, we have the same nervous system. Only you say jar-chaytan. And I say Pure. That’s all. … [Meditation] When you meditate, the nerves give you a totally different canvas. Only when it changes will the dream figures appear. If the canvas does not change, then you will remain in deep sleep, because the deep sleep canvas is different—where the dream does not exist, the waking state is absorbed, and the mind is completely sleeping. The waking-state space is also a different canvas. But that which is You is not a canvas. It is not a mirror, so there is no reflection other than You. There are no three states other than You.If a canvas is not there, then what is it? That I call Pure. Whenever that Pure appears, you know it. You are liberated from watching and being watched, from existing and non-existing. That is Free. So Pure and Free. And when you reach realization, you come to know that it is forever the same. Then a blazing fire may come, whether small, big or bigger, it doesn’t matter. Shyam Space, the sky, is the same. Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. …
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