Meditation and the Worriless State

Kritarth (Kim): You stressed that I should meditate every day. In order to purify the system one has to meditate. I feel that I am not meditating well. Is there such a thing as a good or a not good meditation?

Swami-ji: A tomato can be good or bad. A meditation would be good or bad if meditation was a thing. Meditation isn’t even a thing, so why good meditation and bad meditation? 
    Meditation is not good. Meditation is not bad. 
    Knowingness is not good. Knowingness is not bad. 
    If I see a maala, or a plate it is knowingness. Things can be good, bad, usable or unusable, but meditation is not good or bad.
    Meditation is a state of consciousness. 
    Human beings don’t know what meditation is. They don’t know what sleep is, but they sleep. They don’t know what dreams are, but they dream. They don’t know what wakefulness is, but they remain awake. Yet they keep saying that they know what sleep, dream, and waking states are.
    In the same way they don’t know meditation, but they started saying, "Meditation is happening and meditation is good. My waking state is good whenever everything is favourable. My dreams are good when there is the Garden of Eden. My sleep is good when there is no disturbance."
   You have to know who says good and who says bad. In satsang you are led from your mind and intellect level to Sat which is truth. Your idea of truth is different and you want to hear the correct meaning of truth. You have heard ‘Truth alone is’ and just let it pass.
    Human beings don’t investigate words and their meanings. Whatever they hear, they think is true. 
    The mind takes anything useful to be true, even words and thoughts: One says "My words. My thoughts. My views, and they are right." You have a mind that thinks that even meditation should be good meditation or meditation should be bad. Meditation has nothing to do with what we are doing. Meditation is so that I should have a little peace of mind! [laughter].

 Meditation is filling the body, but it is not known. 
    You have to start with some technique. Technique not the truth. Walking on the road is just a technique, but it is you who reaches Akhara Bazaar [a local market district]. 
    We meditate with a definite purpose. Nobody has time for himself to think properly. Whenever they have time, they worry. In order to have time, we have to remove the field of worries. In meditation worries recede. They are not there. They may come again, but while meditating worry is not there.

We use a technique, a word, a sound, and sound helps to remove worries. As your ‘yes’ becomes redundant when you say ‘no’ your ‘no’ becomes redundant when you say ‘yes’. Power is in the word.
    Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. 
    Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum, Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum is a technique, a phrase that is given to you. You have heard about goodness, godliness, virtue, kindness, accommodation, and growth, and you know their meaning. In this way, the sound Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum is devised so it won’t convey any meaning other than Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. ‘Yes’ doesn’t convey ‘no’. You cannot change ‘no’ by saying its opposite, ‘yes’. 
    Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum makes your worries fly. What remains? The worriless state. Have you ever checked the quality of the worriless state? Worrilessness is reached in meditation, and the moment you come onto the level of activity of the mind, you are again worried. For a few minutes you are in-between. After that you are the same person.
   Meditation is not needed if you know that when you close the eyes, it is not the eyes which are seeing. But the intellect says, "I see darkness." Eyes are not there to see! When the eyes are closed they don’t see forms. If some form is visible, you cannot compare it to darkness. 
    You say that sunlight is bright and night is dark. That is a human’s understanding. You don’t want to give up your idea because you don’t understand that there is no darkness anywhere. 
    Bats see in the night. They fly in the night and eat your apples. Scientists say bats have a beam that lets them see. Who gives them that beam? Why wasn’t that beam given to you? You are not worse than a bat!

When you close the eyes it is meditation, Self, Aatmaagyaan, Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum. You don’t need to come to Kullu for days and days and close your eyes. You can do it anywhere and you are there. 
    But know the quality of it! 
    Does it amount to be duality? Nowhere! It is Oneness. Oneness is always with you and Oneness permeates your whole body. But you think darkness is in your head. Where does thinking come from? It comes from the space. When you close the eyes, that is the source of your thinking. But you are not trained to believe it and I am not an expert to convince you.
    Close the eyes and whatever you see I say is not darkness. 
    But you ask, "In what way do I differ from Swami-j? Swami-ji, do you see red light or white light?" because for you ‘no darkness’ means light. For me, ‘no darkness’ means Pure Consciousness which never becomes dark!
    Many people recommend eating dried prunes. But you have to know what they produce. What does meditation produce? If it produces worries in you, for God’s sake drop it.

Kritarth: I have the idea that if my thoughts have gone, and time has stopped, then that meditation seems more valuable.

Swami-ji: It seems that you are attached to your good understanding. You say to me, "I am uneasy when I meditate." Meditation is the state of easiness. Close the eyes and you will feel easy because your eyes will not be seeing all the time. Half an hour’s energy consumed by your eyes is conserved and your body feels easy.
    Meditation happens when the space arises. When fever is not in your body, you are free from fever. The word meditation is a suggestion to unfold another state which is hidden, which is not worries. So the worriless state is meditation. But you think meditation is that by closing the eyes and simply repeating Amaram Hum Madhuram Hum, easiness should come.
   There is a difference in communication. You use your system and call it perfect. I use my system and call it imperfect, yet I use it. That is the difference in the human head. Through deep sleep you get relief from the field of your exhaustion. Through meditation you get relief from the field of worries. But that is not the description of what meditation is. When you experiment [Swami-ji closes the eyes] do you see worries?

Kritarth: Sometimes.

Swami-ji: There must be sometime when worries are not. It means that half the time in meditation is worriless and half the time it is full of worries. You want the worriless state. You don’t know why you produce those thoughts which worry you. Then what is the reliance on your intellect? But you rely on your intellect and think you will be able to stop worries. Someone may try to stop the growth of their hair, but they cannot. Why can’t you change your hair colour?
    In meditation your view is altered. If you don’t refine your view, then you will always think that worries will not subside whether you meditate or not. 

Chaitanya’s worries have gone. I see you both as the Being. I respect and love you both. But you introduced to me the idea that you have worries. So I have a concern with you that you should be worriless because you think that you have worries and Chaitanya thinks that she doesn’t have worries. Your constitution is such that it produces worries without your invitation. Who doesn’t invite worries and has no power over worries, yet worries come?

Kritarth: The mind, Kim, doesn’t want worries.

Swami-ji: You are aware of your mind, but the mind creates worries, so why do you say that you don’t want worries when you are only the mind?

Kritarth: Then you say that I am not that.

Swami-ji: Then correct your language and say that you don’t have worries. It needs evolution. 
    Waves are coming and coming, When they don’t subside and  another wave doesn’t arise, it is the same wave. 
    In the field of Pure Consciousness waves have been coming and coming and they are of awareness and consciousness. [Swami-ji holds a spoon]. A wave now arose. My eyes see the spoon. 
    You have not been told that when your eyes see things and forms, they carry consciousness with it. Whenever consciousness is not in the eyes, you may open them, but you don’t see anything. So Consciousness is free. That is your nature—not the consciousness with your eyes. 
    When consciousness is with your eyes, you see the flower and the whole mechanism knows the flower was offered by Gil, and then Gil’s father, and Gil’s father’s father and the universe appears before me. He just offered a flower and the whole universe appears in my mind. 
    Why is it that, in my wave of consciousness, the whole is? 
    In your wave of consciousness is Kim’s mind. That is to be expanded. Now you say, "Yes, there are no worries in me." My stomach has carrots and radishes, but radishes and carrots are not within me. Even the stomach is not within me. 
    In this way, understand that waves are not with water.

I deal with the human consciousness that identifies waves and water, but they are not with the water. Dikpal argues: if waves are not with the water, are they with a cloth? Then I have to agree with him that waves are coming from the water in the water. His mind divides water and waves as separate, therefore, waves are different from water. That is a human being. When you say that you are worried it is saying you are the wave of water. When I stirred your consciousness and subsided your first understanding, then you knew, "Oh yeah. Worries are not in me." 
    Being free, you will be able to watch your worried mind the way you watch the worried mind of a friend. Have that much separation.

Slowly, meditation builds. It is not a matter of one or two days. These people have spent twenty-nine years meditating. We call meditation another state, Turiya—freedom. Human beings have never utilized it. They wake up and begin to smoke and eat.
    Keep remembering with faith, and then you have not to work for twenty years. Just know that you are the one in whom worries don’t exit. You are the one in whom change doesn’t exist. Identify with that. It is not blind faith. It is perfect faith as you have checked that you are not dwelling within the body, yet you have to use it daily and show your passport to the authorities when you fly. You have a double awareness. Many become millionaires, but that doesn’t mean that they cannot use one dollar. You can be in the samaadhi state and you can use your little worries and concerns.

Our study is of nature. Nature is of the mind. Mind will have billions of waves and there are six billion people and the mind is so powerful. That is the nature of the mind. 
    You, by sheer desire of your own, want to love this nature by identifying with it and permeating it. If you become a worried person, then you experience worries.
    Start using the language, "Swami-ji, I watch. I really am the Watcher. I am fully awakened to the fact that whatever mind I have is worried and I don’t like to be worried." 
    You will become a Karm Yogi. You will do the same thing that I do—you don’t want to see anyone’s mind worried. You will start here, with you. You are the one who sees the car and know you are not the car. In your seeing, discrimination is there. 
    When you meditate, who is meditating? Not the I. I am sleeping—not the I. I woke up—not the I. 

You can say, "I woke up." That is the language. 
    Nobody says, "There is a bed with four legs on which the body is sleeping and a rat came and the body woke up." 
    We say, "I am happy. I am worried. I understand. I don’t understand."  It is perfect. But once you have come to know that you are using that I for name’s sake, you came to know that ‘I am I’, and you don’t find yourself anywhere in this body, then conclude, once and for all, that you are forever free.
   Today you came to know that worry is not in you. Meditate for a while. This is simple meditation. You have closed the eyes and are deep in meditation, just by closing the eyes. You cannot expect the result of it right away. Thoughts are going on. In two minutes you will know that no thoughts have been recorded. You will hear the bird’s sound, but you should not think that you are worried. 
    You have the power to create the worry: "Why are these bids singing? Someone should drive them away because we are meditating!" 
    Watch. 
    If the birds were not in you, how could you hear them? Start expanding. The bird’s sound will be much clearer. When we talked, we didn’t hear the birds. In meditation your awareness is heightened. 
    I will be quiet.

20 November 1999